


High Brow Humor

by actuallynobutwhynot



Category: Transformers: Prime
Genre: Gen, Humor, No beta we die like mechs, based off a discord convo, crackfic, little bit ooc because scream and ko are like bitchy bffs who gossip on everyone, megatron is wildin but what else is new, ok so yall know how there were some animation glitches in tfp, well this was literally inspired by one of them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:27:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27731518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/actuallynobutwhynot/pseuds/actuallynobutwhynot
Summary: The name says it all.
Comments: 7
Kudos: 23





	High Brow Humor

Starscream stalked down the halls of the Nemesis, dreading heading back to the command center. After Megatron's seemingly spontaneous decision to stab a shard of dark energon into his spark chamber, it was nigh impossible to tell what kind of mood he would be in at any given moment.  
Starscream was snapped from his thoughts when a small huddle of Eradicons passed him, heading away from the control center.  
'Odd,' he thought. Why weren't they in marching form? He watched them as they passed, curiosity growing. Were they... snickering? He could hear muffled laughter from the group and some of the Eradicon's shoulders were shaking.  
'Stupid drones.' He muttered under his breath. Must've found some mundane bit of human junk to entertain themselves with. Putting the thought out of his mind, Starscream continued to the command center, stepping through the doors onto the main platform. 

Megatron was turned away from him, typing something on the master control panel. Starscream turned to where Soundwave was doing a similar task at the nav station, handing him a data chip.  
'Aquisition of mine HX-12 was successful,' he said as Soundwave took the chip. 'However, as always, there were... complications.'  
Soundwave simply nodded, but a voice sounded from behind Starscream.  
'I assume the Autobots made an appearance?' Megatron said.  
Starscream turned to find Megatron standing less than a foot behind him, and almost went into spark arrest.  
'AH! Uh, yes, the Autobots did show up, but my armada kept them at bay, master.' How the frag had he moved so quickly and quietly?? Starscream quickly regained his composure. 'Rest assured that they were sent back to their base with more than a few wounds to lick.'  
'Well done, Starscream. I must admit, you have been showing slight improvement in the field ever since your armada finished its training. However, I will be expecting perfection from now on, so don't think of this as an opportunity to slack off.' 

As Megatron continued with his usual not-so-subtle threatening of Starscream's life, the Air Commander's attention was pulled to Megatron's eyebrows, which were behaving... strangely. When Megatron inclined his head as he pontificated, Starscream's eyes went wide with shock. Was he seeing things, or were Megatron's eyebrows...floating?  
'STARSCREAM! ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?!'  
The seeker jumped once again as he refocused on Megatron, whose angry faceplate was now mere inches from his.  
'Gah! Ah- please forgive me master, I meant no disrespect! I am still slightly dazed from the battle at the mine, nothing more!' Starscream put on a small, sniveling grin in an attempt to appease the warlord. Unfortunately, Megatron was not satisfied.  
'What could you have POSSIBLY been thinking about that was more important to you than my orders?!' Megatron demanded.  
'My lord, please! I was simply distracted-'  
'By WHAT?!'  
Starscream stuttered, but managed to say: 'It would appear that your brow ridges are... f-floating, my lord.'

Megatron's eyes widened in confusion, his anger momentarily stopped by lack of understanding. His eyes rolled upwards and widened a little bit more when he realized he could not only see his eyebrows, but he could see the space between them and his helm.  
He straightened up, lifting his hand to feel, and sure enough, he could fit his fingers in the gap between his head and brows.  
Meanwhile, Starscream, having recovered a bit, was watching Megatron's every move, watching for some sign of the barely-restrained rage that he had been facing mere moments before. The seeker was taking in the sight of Megatron carefully feeling his eyebrows, which had now been pushed carefully back into place on his helm, with a sort of reverence.  
'It would seem Unicron's blessings come in unexpected forms' Megatron said to himself, yet just loud enough that Starscream heard.  
The warlord lowered his hands, straining his eyes to see if the eyebrows would lift off his face once more. Starscream was beginning to grow uncomfortable; Megatron had never been this quiet for this long before. He cleared his throat, the sound amplified in the large command center.

'Well, it would seem that I have fulfilled my purpose here. I shall go put the Eradicons through a few training regiments, my lord.'  
Megatron's gaze snapped down to look Starscream straight in the optics, an unreadable expression on his face. Starscream gulped. Oh, he was in for it now.  
But instead of laying into him, Megatron simply said: 'Yes, go train the Eradicons, Starscream. We will need them for the next mine aquisition.' He then went back to staring at his brow. His voice had an odd lilt to it, as if he was speaking with a processor full of fog.  
Starscream was taken aback for a klik, but immediately bounced back. So Lord Megatron had decided not to beat him for once. Lucky break. Starscream bowed to Megatron, who was still staring at his own forehead, and quickly waltzed out of the command center.  
As soon as he was a good distance from the main doors, he broke into a full run, heading directly for Knockout's medbay. 

Knockout was just finishing up buffing his claws when something slammed into his door, making him jump and file one finger a tad too short.  
'OW! What the frag?!' he exclaimed, turning to look as the door opened to reveal Starscream, who was panting hard and grinning like an idiot.  
As the seeker stepped in, he let out a dry wheeze, his grin turning manic, as he slumped on a nearby medical slab.  
Knockout immediately jumped into action.  
'Starscream?! What's wrong, why are you wheezing? Are your vents damaged?!'  
The seeker gave no answer, as he was leaning facedown on the slab. His shoulders started jerking, his wings trembling as he vented rapidly.  
'Starscream?!' The medic said again, finally grabbing the seeker's shoulders and roughly yanking his entire body onto the slab, and turning him face up. As Starscream's face was exposed, he finally made a sound- as he laughed right in Knockout's face.  
Knockout, now thoroughly confused and more than a little frustrated with the Air Commander, grabbed the seeker by his shoulder pauldrons as he wheezed and giggled helplessly, tears streaming from his optics.  
'STARSCREAM! What the FRAG is wrong with you?! What's so funny?!' he yelled in the seeker's face. It took Starscream several minutes to calm down, his vents returning to normal as he shook from soundless laughter in Knockout's arms. When he finally seemed to have caught his breath, Knockout released his chestplate and let him sit back on the medical slab.  
'Oooohhh, Knockout, you should have been there...' Starscream said, wiping tears of lubricant from his face.  
Even though the medic was pretty fed up with the seeker at this point, he still managed a smirk as he replied.  
'I wish I had been, I've never seen you laugh that hard before in my life. But enough about me. Spill.'  
Starscream straightened himself back up, turning his helm to face Knockout.  
'Alright, if you insist.... I was in the command center after completing my last mission. Of course, our master took the opportunity to chew me out about my armada's performance, so I wasn't really listening at the time. But then, something AMAZING happened.'  
'Oh really? Something more amazing than the fact our Lord hasn't had a spark attack from Dark Energon exposure yet?' Knockout drawled.  
'Oh, hush, you, I'm getting to the good part.' Starscream said, playfully swatting the doctor's arm.  
'Anyway, I was nodding along with whatever he was saying when i noticed there was something off about his face; specifically, his eyebrows.'  
'His what??'  
'Knockout, I swear to you I am telling the entire truth when I say they were floating off his forehead.' Knockout stared at the seeker for a moment, then a small smile tugged at his derma.  
'Come again, Herr Kommandant?'  
'Knockout. His fragging eyebrows. 3 inches off his face. Floating. I swear.'  
As if to nail the point home, Starscream used his clawlike fingers to demonstrate the runaway brows, wiggling them in midair.  
Knockout stared at the display for a moment before giving a wheezy bark of laughter and covering his face with his hands, slumping on the side of the slab. Still bent double, he cackled helplessly as Starscream giggled at the memory.  
Knockout tried to gain his composure, looking back at Starscream after he caught his breath, but the seeker took that moment to waggle his own eyebrows, throwing the medic into another fit of laughter.

'So-ha- so you're telling me his brow ridges, they were just- just disconnected?'  
'Yes. But the BEST part was when he asked me why I was distracted. Oh, Primus, the look on his face! He looked like he was trying to roll his optics back in his head! And then- stop giggling that's not even the best bit- he stood back and started feeling up his eyebrows! He looked like a newspark realizing he has a face for the first time!'  
'Hold on-I need a moment-' Knockout managed to wheeze out as he caught his breath.  
'After he pushed them back into place, he started muttering some scrap about the "power of Unicron" showing itself in mysterious ways.'  
'Wait, let me get this straight- he thinks that Unicron- a dead chaos god- is causing his eyebrows to be haunted?'  
'It would seem so.'

Both mechs, having calmed down, now sat in thoughtful silence.  
'You know, he might actually be right. I can't think of any way this would be medically possible, especially if Megatron didn't know it was happening himself.' Knockout said.  
'Are you saying you think his "powers of Unicron theory" might be true?' Starscream asked incredulously.  
'Hey, all I know is our lord's brow ridges have decided to take on a life of their own, that seems like a pretty chaotic thing, wouldn't you agree?'  
'I suppose....Maybe the Unmaker has a sense of humor,' Starscream said, grinning.

**Author's Note:**

> This entire fic was spawned from a discussion in which me and a friend were cracking up about an animation glitch in tfp where megatron's eyebrows were floating off his forehead. One thing led to another, and we decided that the floating brows were caused by dark energon fucking with megan's eyebrows.  
> Possible chapter two on the way when I get the motivation!


End file.
